Metropolitan life and death.
I could feel the hate burning inside me. Growing with each passing day; growing with each crime I commit. Ever since I was attacked, I could not stop the voices in my head from trying to take control. I had hoped that I could stop them, but now I know I can not. I gave over my will to the beast that raged inside me. I started driving towards a metropolitan area, a place where killings can go unnoticed for some time. I stopped at a few yard sales along the way and bought a few handguns. I waited for a while until I bought the ammo for them. About 50 miles till the city I stopped at a rest stop. Saw a young man working on his car. He would start it and not like what it sounded like and then tinker a little more. The car was an awful looking wreck. I thought it had more rust than paint on it, but the young fellow sure thought it was nice. I approached him and asked about his car. He told a long story about how hard he had work and how little he got for his money. I then told him a sad story about buying this bike for an ex-boyfriend the day he broke up with me and how I kept the bike out of spite, but now wanted to get rid of it because the wind and the rain were too much for me. I then asked if he knew any of his friends that would want to trade a car for my bike. He said not off hand but he wished his car was in better shape because he loves motorcycles. In the next few minutes, the boy had a motorcycle and I had my junk loaded in the back of the car and was back on the road for the city.
The car lasted into town. I doubt it would last much farther, but that was ok. I did not plan to leave this city. I left most of my gear locked in the car. I then went down to the subway. It was almost dark I road around for a while. Got a feel for how long it was between stops and which stops were crowded and which were not. There were three stops that ended above ground, on platforms above the street. These platforms were always deserted. After midnight, the subway was almost totally deserted. I went to the last car and waited. Finally, everything timed out right. There was a single man in the car and I could not see anyone in the next car. The man looked at me on occasion. I started smiling at him. He must have been bar hopping because he did not think it at all strange that I would flirt with him in this way.
We just pulled out of the station on a stop before a platform; I had two minutes to make my move. With one hand, I began to run my crotch with my legs spread wide open; the other hand beckoned the man to me. He came willingly. When he was about six feet away I dropped my beckoning hand to my purse and pulled the pistol out. It was a .22 so would not make much noise. As the brakes started to stop the train, I fired into the man’s chest. He fell to the floor with out making a sound. I got up, went to the door, and exited the train. The platform was deserted. I loaded the pistol and walked down the stairs to the street.
I was in the middle of a neighborhood. It was very dark and the buildings and street looked very dingy. I think I should have planned better with where I was getting off at as well. I walked through the streets zigzagging on occasion. I walked down a narrow alley. A man was going thru the trash until he saw me. He then turned his attentions to me. I stood cowered until he was close enough then I shot him. I was getting good using this gun, but I would have to discard it soon or they could connect a few of the slaying to me. I saw a gang hanging out on the street corner, and being this late, they cat called towards me. I saw an entrance to a subway not ten feet away. I shouted an obscenity at the youths and threw the gun towards them. I knew they would think they scared me so bad I lost my gun and they would keep the souvenir, at least that was what I was counting on. I took the subway to within twenty blocks of my car. I walked the rest of the way. I fell asleep in the car until it got too hot the next day.
I placed another gun in my purse and took a small duffel bag of clothes with me. I stopped at a fast food restaurant and got a burger and fries. After I ate I went into the bathroom, wet a wash cloth, went into a stall, and then cleaned up a little and changed my clothes. I dropped the duffel at the car and went to a park. I sat for an hour and watched the children play. I decided to go back to my car and get my drawing equipment. I returned to the park and drew the scenery for a while, but then I started drawing death scenes again. I stopped drawing. I returned all my drawing to the car and got a pocketknife.
I walked towards the center of the city. I saw a side road to my left and several neon signs on in the daytime. I walked down the street to see what they were. I had found the red light district. I walked into the first porn shop that advertised quarter movies. I walked past several booths and saw many had holes cut into the wall. I entered on that had both doors closed on either side. I put a quarter in the slot and a movie started showing on the small screen. I bent over and looked thru the hole. A man was in the next booth stroking himself. When he saw some one was next to him, he stuck his cock thru the peephole. At first, I did not know what to do. I knew that if I waited too long he would remove himself. I started to stroke him with one hand while reaching in my purse with the other. I took out my knife and cut him flush with the wall removing most of his penis. He made a small yell and must have passed out from the sound next door. I left the room quickly and left the building. The noise he made could have been mistaken for an orgasm, if I were lucky.
I tossed the knife into a storm drain three or four blocks away. I noticed I had a couple drops of blood on my hand. I pocketed the hand and went into a bar. I went straight to the restroom and washed the blood off. I returned to the bar and ordered a wine cooler. When I was half way thru it, a man came up to me and tried to pick me up. He said he knew a hotel where we could get a room for a few hours and talk. I agreed to go with him. He bought a bottle of wine before we left the bar.
The motel was only three doors down from the bar. He rented a room for six hours and put it on a credit card. We went up to the room. He was trying his best to talk me out of my pants. Once in the room, I asked him to undress. He was more than willing to comply. Then I sat on a chair, took off my shoes and asked him to massage my feet. Once he started rubbing them with his hands, I told him I wanted him to massage them with his tongue. He bent over and started to lick them. I picked up the full bottle of wine and hit him across the crown of his head. I took a small knife and shredded his shirt into small strips to tie his arms and legs. I then took his pants and made a nice gag for him.
I called the front desk, asked how much it would be to keep the room for the rest of the night, and then asked if they could just put the balance on the credit card. After that was taken care of, I laid down on the bed. It had been a few days since I was able to get a good night’s rest.
A few hours later I could hear the man start to stir. I opened my eyes and watched him as he realized he was bound and gagged. I could see the fear in his eyes once I picked up the knife. I could feel my demon wanting blood, but no quick kill this time. I could start to see many ways to torture some one. I started leaving small cuts over his body. The blood oozed out slowly. He struggled to get free, but the more he tried, the worse I would hurt him. After an hour of sawing into his flesh, I decided I was bored. I took his belt, wrapped it around his neck, rolled him over on his stomach, and pulled the belt as tight as I could. He could still breathe just enough to survive so I stood on his back and leaned all my weight pulling away from him. This time it was enough.
I left the room and walked a few blocks. I was still tired. I saw a mall and decided to walk around inside it for a while. I stopped at an electronics store and saw a big screen TV on display. I watched it for a few minutes since the news was on. I saw a short clip of me in the porn store with a story that police were on the look out for me. They wanted to question me about an attack that occurred while I was in the area. I started to head for the door, but another customer blocked my exit. He identified himself as a police officer and caught me by the wrist. I tried to pull away but the man was too strong for me. He took me back to the store’s office where he cuffed me and read me my rights. He made a phone call and in a few minutes some uniformed policemen came to take me away.
The porn shop had me on film entering and leaving the booth, and the police connected me to the man in the motel. They traced my bike to the boy had traded it to and then found the car I was using. I was rather stupid to have saved the crossbow and have some of the bb’s and gunpowder left. Those crimes were added to my indictment. The trial was short. The doctor that had saved me after my rape and beating had shown up in court to tell of how he thought this had started. I think he would have made a great difference if the jury had not known about the interstate bombings and met a few of the survivors and the families of those that had not survived.
I was sentenced to death, and have been on death row for over a year. My time is almost here. I wanted to write down what I had down and why so that those who did not know what I had done to them could know that I was the one that hurt their family or friends. I hope these people can put their demons to rest before they start talking to them.
My last meal is arriving. I end my story here. I will eat, be prayed over, and then I will die. I regret what I have done, but I am glad it is over and the voices will finally shut up!
Posted by shannonwagoner
at 7:47 AM EDT
